I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
