Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize