is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
