forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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