I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
