you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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