Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize