Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
