I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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