so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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