HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
