I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
