No awkward lesbian experiences without me
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
