That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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