I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
