Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
