There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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