you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I deserve to be covered in dicks
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize