Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
