my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
