I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
