im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
