Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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