Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
