His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize