I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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