with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
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