the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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