He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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