I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
only if we run a train.
done.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
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