Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Please don't give away my fajitas
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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