good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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