I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
