We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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