Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
