I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
