I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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