I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize