So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
