what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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