You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I would fuck him just for his dog
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
