I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
