i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
