? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
