just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
