So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize
