I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
