lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
