so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize