She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
