Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
